Secret recipe for pound cake

This is my grandmother's secret recipe for Asian pound cake. First , find a girl named Cake. Then find 10 Asian men. Put both in the same room and let the men have at her. Let Cake drip dry.

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I confess there is a bottle of dijon mustard in my refrigerator that I've been stroking loads into for a few months now. There are probably ten or fifteen loads of cum mixed thoroughly into the mustard. Last night my wife emptied the jar, using it in a recipe for a dish she's taking to a holiday party at her job today. Wish I could be there to see the ladies she works with unknowingly slurping down my cum. Does anyone else have similar stories?

im a cute, athletic Latino bottom type.  looking to give head and take a load to my face and mouth. no recip.  Older men are cool too.  Let me know… I can host too.  All alone here visiting in the San Diego / Carlsbad area.  I’m smooth face, short, cute, 5ft5.

Recipe for this pig meat?

I'm at it again. While surfing through the net I came across a cookbook. As I am alone, I am always interested in simple recipe's. But I think I will pass on this particular book. Cooking with Semen. It did get me to thinking. We have all heard of the, hopefully, urban legend of the Taco Bell sour cream. Some women swallow it. Most have tasted it and most don’t find it particularly distasteful. And it is primarily protein.
Years ago a female friend of mine just had to see me one morning. I went to her apartment and she proceeded to tell me that she had caught her boyfriend with another woman. She was going to have him over for supper and break up with him. Then she asked me if I masturbated. I was kind of surprised and finally said that I did at times. Then she asked me if I could do it now. I told her that I was sure that I could but why? She said that she wanted me to do it in a small bowl. Her boyfriend likes Blu Cheese dressing on his salad and she was going to make a special batch and tell him what was in it in a few days. She said that he wouldn’t even kiss her after oral, so that would fix him good. As much as I hated to, I told her that I wouldn’t feel right doing that. I wouldn’t want it done to me and I didn’t want to do it to someone else. The she asked me if I wanted her to do it for me. Now that was tempting as much as I love hand jobs, but  as hard as it was(difficult may be a better word), I had to decline. She said that she understood.
I am sure that she got a volunteer later.
Now I am wondering. Is this common? I am half scared to eat at someone else’s house now. It wouldn’t kill me and I will kiss a woman after oral and don’t feel less of a man when I admit that I have tasted it in a partners mouth. It's not unpleasant. I just don’t think that I'd want to make it a steady diet.
Has anyone else run into anything similar? I would love to hear your thoughts on this.

So,I've got a nice piece of fish for dinner and wondering if anyones got a good recipe for baby batter.
What are YOUR main ingredients for making baby batter?

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I confess that I am finally ready to fulfill a long time fantasy, and I'm wondering if anyone here has done it. It's probably not too common.

I am going to cut an entire tit off a chick. I don't want to kill her so I'm praying things don't get out of control. But I plan to hire a hooker with big tits, probably from Craigslist. I have access to a place that's pretty remote near the shore where I'll take her to execute my plan. I know I'll have to do it either before or whilst I )fuck her, lest I lose the courage.

For you pussies out there, don't worry, I'll disinfect the hole before dropping her off anonymously at a hospital. She'll be fine.

I plan to freeze the tit and eat it a bit at a time, saving the nipple for last.

Has anyone else done this? Not looking for advice, though recipes or cooking suggestions might be nice, if you have any.