Im only here to warn all of you that the return of God is imminent. You all need to repent before it's too late
Replies 22
1
06 Jun 2011 11:32PM
Hi,
Satan here.
I just killed god, oh and I raped jesus too!
Take care and see you real soon!
1
01 Aug 2011 12:04AM
I'll repent all over your face! What sort of sicko is fucked enough to be in this site but dumb enough to preach after they fap... Loser bitch
1
01 Aug 2011 5:17PM
OP is fear the only trick the religiously retarded have got left nowadays, what with the rest of your fairytales not standing up scrutiny?
Theists, please do us all a favour: arrange the time and place for all your fellow sky-fairy following fuckwits from across the globe to meet up once and for all. Whichever fairy you bow and scrape to, gather one and all. Then kindly help each other to find out who was right about the afterlife. Don't leave anyone out.
1
02 Aug 2011 12:39AM
Damn. I was gonna write all that stuff you guys already did. You better repent for stealing my shit, or you're gonna go burn in comedy hell!
1
02 Aug 2011 10:42AM
how about if i kneel down here, right in front of you.
will you scold me and tell me what the bible says about whores?
even jesus whipped the moneychangers, right?
to save their souls, and make them be good?
will you whip me and punish me and make me be good for you?
will you tell me what god thinks of a ball licking tongue or a hungry hungry pussy?
tell me while you whip me and preach fire on me, please
1
02 Aug 2011 12:04PM
Whens he returning, got his flight details yet? Maybe I could meet him at the airport
1
02 Aug 2011 7:13PM
HEY OP! GO READ A NEW FICTION BOOK! THE BIBLE IS OLD NEWS. JUST LIKE THE EGYPTIAN, GREEK, ROMAN, AND VIKING GODS, YOURS IS ALSO A FRAUD. WAKE UP AND JOIN THE 21ST FUCKING CENTURY....DICKWEED!!!!!!!
1
07 Aug 2011 3:10AM
I just accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and SAVIOR. Thanks you for saving my life.
1
07 Aug 2011 10:35AM
OP is an obvious dimwit. If God is everywhere, then how can His "return"
be imminent? You can't return if you haven't left, you jack-wagon fucktard!
1
16 Aug 2011 1:18AM
I would love to sink my solid dick deep down into god's tight little asshole!
1
16 Aug 2011 2:21AM
After what happened to me at church when I was nine I'm never going back.
I do like how you posted it in the funny section though.
1
22 Aug 2011 6:48AM
This is God,Yes the one true God. I know you haven't heard from me in a while, but I just wanted to say, I'm already back, and if your reading this STOP! There is a huge porn section stop waisting your time here, If it wasn't for needing a break from looking for that next sluty virgin that will fuck my old ass, I wouldn,t be in the joke section either. That is all, back to masterbating everyone, praise me.
1
28 Aug 2011 4:12PM
Well when God returns he better do so with a goddam sandwich cuz my bitch still ain't.
