I am a single woman, 35, chronically single, by my own choice. I look good, take good care of myself, but one might say that I am too selfish to have a serious relationship, not that I haven't tried. My sex drive is high, there is no question about that, but I am not the kind to sleep around with anyone, I had a few FWB, but most of the time I enjoy my solitude, and in times of need, I resort to tickling my own fantasy, in places like this one.
This long prelude has it's purpose, for you to fully understand this, my first confession here.
I have a really close friend, a woman my age, who I've known for more than ten years .We met at work, and she was the one pushing our friendship to the level of sharing everything with each other, talking about things one would shy away from even thinking about, and I think the success of this arrangement lies on the fact, that what I have with her, is the absolute opposite of who I actually am.
Now we skip to the interesting part. She has a bf, and they live together for almost five years now, and it is a matter of time when they will marry, and, a while back, she started questioning me about my sex life, but not in a way, like, "what is new", but about my past experiences, especially about the fact if I ever did something crazy. I knew, she wanted something, but couldn't quite figure it out, so I encouraged her to talk, and...
Well, they were talking about their ultimate sex fantasies, and his was, you can guess which... And it remained there, we laughed, I said it is typical, and that was it. About a month back, she started the subject again, I had to use claws to pull words out of her mouth, but somehow, she managed to tell me, that they spoke about a potential FFM, and that my name came up. Who was it, him or her? She said that it was her idea of naming me, and that she feels it is stupid, but at the moment she thought that I am the olny person close enough to her, that she could, potentially imagine herself with, in such scenario. We were kind of tipsy, and I said, fuck it, I will do it if you want me to.
Seven days ago, she told me that they wanted to ask me, if I really meant what I said. I honestly do not know how, but at the end of the night, we arranged for me to come over to their place, a date scheduled for last night.
Now, the morning after, I am afraid that my relationship with her, is beyond repair.
It was awkward, she was almost shaking how nervous she was, wine helped, and I felt sorry for her, but it somehow happened. First we sucked him, together, and he came really fast, gave it all to me, not even thinking about her. I did swallow and thought, well, this was awkward, thinking that will be the end of it, but as she continued to suck him, after he pulled out of my mouth, he started to grow again, really fast, so I joined in to help again. Then she got on top of him, and at this part, I was just a spectator, even though he called me to come closer, but I did not want to kiss him. When she was done, he got up, got a condom on, and got on top of me. My poor friend did everything to join in, to somehow tag along, she kissed him, licked his balls, but he was 100% focused on me, acting like she is not even there. I was horny, but I didn't cum, because I am unable to without clitoral stimulation. After he was done, he got up, obviously wanting to leave immediately, but she got him in her mouth, and pulled the rubber with her lips, then showing off to him, how she sucks on it.
She looked like she was about to cry, and did start to, as soon as he left the room, for the bathroom. I really felt that, tried consoling her, but she just shook her head, and started covering up.
It is morning here, now. I will call her, as soon as I am done posting this, but I have this feeling that we both fucked up, me and him, and that she will have trouble swallowing this, ever.
