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COMEDY

63 Uploads · 47 Members · 29 Forum Posts · 20,575 Visitors
This is a group where you can post your best/worst jokes, funny videos pix etc etc. just to show we are not just porn lets have some fun people

Best Of British & The Worst

4,320 Uploads · 1,490 Members · 19 Forum Posts · 610,011 Visitors
The Best of British and The Worst!

Lemarchand's box

737 Uploads · 363 Members · 1 Forum Posts · 743,689 Visitors
A place where slave girls nightmares come true. Featuring the very best and worst of BDSM. Only the hottest, nastiest kink porn is found here so if you like it nice and sweet turn back now. This is for the whores, sluts and cunts that desire suffering, pain and humiliation you are all welcome here. Come and enjoy the delightful pain.

Girls that love to lick toilets

395 Uploads · 224 Members · 6 Forum Posts · 73,026 Visitors
Description:Welcome to "Girls that love to lick toilets!" - a fun and quirky group dedicated to celebrating the unique passion of girls who find joy in the art of licking toilets! 🎉If you're someone who has discovered the delightful pleasure of tasting toilets or if you're simply curious about this fascinating and lighthearted interest, you've come to the right place! Our gr...
Description:Welcome to "Girls that love to lick toilets!" - a fun and quirky group dedicated to celebrating the unique passion of girls who find joy in the art of licking toilets! 🎉If you're someone who has discovered the delightful pleasure of tasting toilets or if you're simply curious about this fascinating and lighthearted interest, you've come to the right place! Our group is all about creating a positive and friendly space where like-minded individuals can connect, share experiences, or maybe more ;).🍽️ What to Expect:👅 Engaging Discussions: Share your thoughts and experiences related to toilet licking! Discuss the various types of toilets you've encountered, the best and worst ones to lick, and any amusing encounters you've had along the way.📸 Photo and Video Gallery: Show off your toilet-licking adventures! Share snapshots and short videos of your fun encounters with toilets, be it during travels, family gatherings, or at your favorite coffee shop, friends home, wrok, .....So, what are you waiting for? Join us now and let the toilet-licking adventures begin! 🍽️😋...

Men That Shit on Camera

213 Uploads · 116 Members · 1 Forum Posts · 13,534 Visitors
Welcome To The Shit Show MEN are expressly encouraged to shit all over this group get your shitting, pissing, drinking and whatever else you desire done and posted.EVERYONE is welcome to shit, piss, eat, drink smear, or whatever your scat desire is, but MEN are the focus here since there is a lack of groups allowing men to shit solo freely on film. So guys feel at home to shit and post here just like... HAN......SOLO and may the sharts be with you....MEN,WOMEN, AND EVERYONE SHIT FREELY UPLOAD YOUR WORST.Thank you, Stonethings

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3
Anonymous
@confessions
03 Aug 2022 10:11AM
• 5,265 views • 0 attachments
[ − ] thread [ 18 replies ]

I knew about my son`s cuckold relationship thanks to acquaintances. We all belong to the BDSM community. I was having none of it. Although I had always been very dominant with him, I expected he would behave like a man with his wife, not to let her step over him like he did. That´s why I always spanked my daughter in law, to get her to know her place.The worst part was the identity of the “bull”: a SWITCH (ie, someone who can be both a dominant AND a submissive, depending on the circunstances, therefore, NOT A REAL DOMINANT) whom I have dominated several times at BDSM meetups, without sex. Imagine my frustration when I realized this poor excuse for a man, whom I have had literally kissing my feet, was topping both my son and daughter in law, pretending to be an “alpha male”. So I tried to talk him out of the picture in the next meetup. First, I tried to reason with him, to no avail. Then I used my daughter in law as a whipping girl, but this just turned him on even more. So I appealed to his submissive side just by ordering him to end that relationship, to which he said this wasn´t my business. I threatened to reveal to both of them who he really was. He didn´t respond, so I backed him against a wall, slapped him across the face and had him opening his mouth so I could spit inside. After he swallowed, I touched his boner and commented how aroused he was getting with my mistreatment, as a reminder of his true role. He looked at me a bit scared but didn´t cave in. My frustration grew even stronger when my son told me he was planning to get my daughter in law pregnant from their “bull”. I knew they wouldn´t believe me he was a switch, so I arranged a meetup with the four of us, so they could see it by their own eyes. Upon arrival, I told him I was going to spank him and ordered him to strip naked. After a moment of hesitation and looking to the three of us, he obliged. They couldn´t believe their eyes. Then I did the same to my DIL. Then I took the two of them, broken and naked, to my bedroom and told my son to wait outside. Once inside, I sat on the bed and told my DIL to sit in a chair, kiss my feet and take off my heels. While she did, I fondled her body (I´ve always had a bi streak) and taunted her about how I had “her bull” wrapped around my finger now. Then I took off my dress and underwear and told her to lie on the bed. She looked at my naked body with a mix of jealousy and fear and shook her head. She knew what was coming. For a moment I thaught about ordering the “bull” to restrain her for me, but I didn´t want any more physical contact between those two, so, instead, I said to him “Don´t intervene, and don´t masturbate, just sit there and enjoy, this is between she and me, did you get it?”. My DIL couldn´t believe when he just answered with a very submissive “Yes, Ma ´am”.Despite being younger, she is a petite woman, so it was easy for me to push her to the bed and climb over her. She tried to resist and, to her credit, gave quite a good fight, but she was no match for me. I managed to pin her wrists against the headboard, plant a kiss on her and trib her to orgasm. Then I threw her, had her lying flat on her back and sat on her face. I ordered her to lick me to orgasm, which she did. Meanwhile, I taunted her about how much she enjoyed the tribbing and how much “her bull” was enjoying the show. When I came, I told her to sat on the chair and watch how submissive was “her bull” on bed. I had him handcuffed to the bed and told him he couldn´t cum without my permission, to which he only responded “Yes, Ma ´am”. I straddled, scratched, slapped, spat, smother and had him begging to be allowed an orgasm. He obliged like the good submissive he actually is. When he cum, I had my DIL clean up the creampie from my cunt, something she did with my son as part of their cuckolding practices. When she was done, I told her to spit the cum on “her bull”`s face. She did it without hesitation and with a lot of rage. I was having the time of my life, so I told her to feel free to take out her frustration with him, just like I did. She straddled him and spent a good while slapping his face, body and balls and calling him a wimp and a fraud. As you can imagine, I encouraged her to continue. Not only she ended that fake relationship, I ended up turning him into the cuckold he actually is in the following months, having him watching me with other men while he only watched, and performing degrading acts just like he did to my son. And then I dumped him, too. These days, either he performs as a submissive or switches with other fake dominants like him. No one has taken him seriously as a dominant since that day. 

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Anonymous
@chicks
17 Nov 2011 10:42PM
• 5,304 views • 4 attachments
[ − ] thread [ 13 replies ]

What do you think? Slut that went to my high school, I would tear it up even though she's a bitch and a fucking whore.

Do your worst

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Anonymous
@confessions
11 Aug 2007 12:35PM
• 822 views • 0 attachments
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I have fucked both my wife's little sisters. One just a few times, and one I was fucking for over a year (both were adults). She found out about the one, but not the other. The worst part is I don't regret it, or really feel that bad about it, and I know I'd do it again if the opportunity comes up.

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bennieboi20
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@chicks
30 Jul 2012 6:53PM
• 3,818 views • 1 attachment
[ − ] thread [ 5 replies ]

So I work as an IT technican at a secondary school (high school to the americans) found a facebook picture of one of the girls and her mates tell me which ones you'd fuck from best to worst

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Anonymous
@confessions
27 May 2007 2:49PM
• 1,039 views • 0 attachments
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The worst thing I ever done -- I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa -- and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

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Anonymous
@random
20 Dec 2017 10:27PM
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Beyond the Horizon

Part 1

One of the lessons you learn after years of driving is that at some point or another, you’re going to experience the pain of repetition and predictability. Even when I first started off on the journey, I never had a destination in mind. It’s like as soon as I sat down and closed the door, it was getting hazy. It’s apparent to me now that from the moment I turned that old key and fired her up I was totally unsure of to exactly where I thought I was going. Driving is one of my greatest pleasures. There’s a sincere innocence in the act of driving. I lost sight of much of that, and from time to time I wasn’t sure if I was even in control. From a certain perspective the relationship between the machine and it’s controller breaks down, and it can become objectively difficult to distinguish which is driven by which.

To be fair, the warning signs were all over the place. It felt like I couldn’t go more than ten seconds without some sign, a precaution, a rule, a rule of thumb, a word of advice whispered in confidence. I always did my best to be a responsible driver. For the longest time I did my best to obey all the rules of the road, back before I knew better, or perhaps until I thought I knew better. Experience is the greatest teacher, not to mention the harshest. It’s common knowledge that to learn from experience makes even the worst decisions worthwhile. Sometimes it’s simply the only thing that one can take away from the curveballs so often thrown one’s way. The problem for the unwise lies in working out what lesson the accused is to take away from his crime. For the introspective the problem is rarely not seeing the problem at hand. They can even take precautions to make sure that one accident is never repeated, by not repeating whatever lead to disaster the first time around. For the experienced, and by that I mean the scarred, the disfigured, those drivers who possibly still hurt every waking day of their lives, there are an entirely different set of problems, regardless of their ability to learn from past experiences. The problem faced by the salty, by the ones who well and truly drove around that block more than they care to admit, is the inability to disengage from what they think they know best, and in doing so they find themselves sat exactly where they were before they even released the handbrake. One cannot escape his past, cannot escape the stupid things they did. But to make matters worse, they begin to see that so many of the reflective, glaring, fluorescent signs they are bombarded with as they hit the highway begin to contradict each other. They blur, they all look the same, sound the same. It seems impossible to follow one highway code without breaking another. At first, one particularly thoughtful individual might find, there seemed to be one over-arching Way. The irrefutable Tao of the road. The one true way. I miss that idea. I’ve reached a point where no matter how hard I try and see things as I used to, either I changed, or the rules did.

And so those rare unfortunates may find the signs begin to undermine each other. Slow down, but speed up. Be cautious, but never so more than you’re being brazen. Make sure to flaunt every last thing you have and haven’t ever done, because nobody likes It when you brag. And so experience fails you. It begins to lie to you, and even when you’re aware that there is clearly deception afoot, you become a man looking at a map with no reference as to where in the fuck they actually are. It’s at this point in my career as a driver that I also realised that for all the years I had been driving, I could not remember where I was going. I knew that I had been driving for a very long time, and I think at certain points I had stopped off at places, and I still remember the people I picked up. Some of them drove with me for the longest time. I always liked having passengers, but sooner or later, the destination is reached, and the journey has come to an end. But I digress. At a certain point, I found myself lost. It was the worst kind of lost, in that not only did I not know at all where and when I was, but in that I had totally forgotten where I had originally intended to go. I could not even remember at what point I had forgotten everything about myself. All I knew was in looking in the mirror, I was sure I didn’t recognise myself. I could not even describe the person who stared back at me. The Driver was a man about which you could say so much, but I’m quite certain that none of the obvious things you could gleam from that countenance were objectively correct. Nothing I’ve ever experienced has been quite so simple as that. First impressions are hard to resist, however. In a way it didn’t matter that I’m sure in some ways I recognised the Driver’s face, because from the moment I met his eyes with mine, I knew he’d always be a simple mystery to me, destined to be my enemy, the one who knew me the best.

He had the look of the man who has learned from experience as he lit that cigarette. The glow from the lighter revealed a face older and more weathered than I’m sure my own face was. He looked bad. I was certain he didn’t have the slightest good intention in mind for me, and yet everything in his eyes and in the tone of his voice struck me as sincere and well meaning. He spoke to me as if he knew me. We’re on the road now aren’t we? I’ve always loved these warm nights, the heady smell in the air. He grinned, and his eyes lit up. I suddenly felt thirsty. Thirstier than I’ve ever felt in my life. There was adrenaline coursing through my body now, and most of my worry had suddenly receded. As he rolled down the window, an old and child-like excitement crossed his face, as a child who is told on Christmas day that the best present has been saved to last. What does it even matter where we’re going? The pleasure’s in the driving. It’s also in the uncertainty. We passed a strange scene by the side of that long road. This struck me because until now it had all been so blank. There was a cow being led down the road by two men, one in front, and one following up from behind. We passed so quickly that the image struck me as an old black and white picture would have, fixed in my mind without the suggestion of fading. It was like some grim scene from a foreign abattoir, and I felt my spirit drop, knowing where the cow’s destination lay despite all his ignorance. He looked complacent if not slightly confused as to his predicament, being lead by his handlers as he was. For some unknown reason, I honestly felt very sad for him. Then I laughed. Fucker should have evolved faster. I couldn’t but help show the slightest disapproval, even if deep down something in me knew it was true. It would be pretty much the same if the boot was on the other foot. Or hoof. You get my drift. I laughed again, and I wasn’t sure if it was humour or desperation I heard in that laugh. It sounded strange to me, but laughs always sound strange when you really listen to them. Everyone knows what a laugh means, but that shit can’t be found in any dictionary I ever heard of.

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Anonymous
@confessions
03 Dec 2014 9:21PM
• 1,722 views • 0 attachments
[ − ] thread [ 3 replies ]

I must confess this site sucks and the board post on here are pathetic. Just a bunch of fake pics of girls none of you have ever fucked or even know. Then you have the fags pretending to be girls posting fake pics trying to get someone to respond. Hell I post a real whore on here and you dumb fucks have no idea what to do, lol. Worst fucking site I have ever been on.

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Anonymous
@confessions
10 Apr 2012 12:17PM
• 92 views • 1 attachment
[ − ] thread [ 1 reply ]

im a guy who just sucked his first cock, spent so long fantasying about it, and finally gave up on girls fucking me over all the time, at least i know when im with a guy the worst that can happen is i get fucked in the ass

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Anonymous
@requests
23 Oct 2015 6:52AM
• 615 views • 0 attachments
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I am a submissive little who're who will do anything for her master and whoever her master tells her to please. Please tell me the worst things you would do to me and my ass. Please sirs and madams.

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Anonymous
@confessions
10 Apr 2012 2:49PM
• 123 views • 0 attachments
[ − ] thread [ 2 replies ]

I confess. The worst pain I ever had was trying to hide my cock from my grandkids, I caught the tip of the head of my cock in my zipper. Holy shit. Could here me screaming 10 blocks away. Never had anything hurt so bad.

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Anonymous
@confessions
08 Sep 2023 2:53PM
• 2,177 views • 4 attachments
[ − ] thread [ 7 replies ]

Mail Order Bride: My Experiences
This is probably going to be a long read.
I'm not sure if anyone on this site has delved into mail order brides, but if you've got the money and you're lonely - it's not the worst thing in the world to do. I've always had several fetishes for oriental and even Russian ladies. So after grieving for a few years after my wife left me for another woman (yes, that fucked with me in so many ways), I decided to try the dating scene. I'd make matches, sometimes even hook up with the lady but nothing really ever clicked enough for me to have a long term relationship with the women. It was date, fuck, on to the next. It got old fast and I was looking for something more, looking for a woman that was actually in to me. So one day I decided to try it.

The sign up fees are stupid and can range from $70 - $200 a month depending on the package you select. I figured I'd make quick work out of it and find someone I was interested in and exchange personal information with them. SO I signed up.
A lot of these girls look like 10/10 models - they all have professional pictures taken and I was like "well I just got scammed, they're all fake as fuck." Seeing all of these flawless women was a bit of a turn off for me - being in my late 40s, I knew I wasn't a bad looking guy but these women - all of them were way out of my league and I had my doubts, especially because I know a majority of them are after citizenship. I felt like I made a big mistake.
I contacted a couple of the ladies, usually didn't get a response. One day I logged in and this very attractive Filipino lady left me a message, just saying "Hi. Saw your profile."
I went to her profile and looked at her pictures, and just kinda shook my head.
I was talking to other women on there, but nothing really panned out. A lot of them barely spoke English.
So I chatted her up. I told her that we had an obvious age difference, and that I didn't know if she'd be comfortable with that. She replied back, "Most Filipina ladies like older men, it's kind of a cultural thing. I like older white men."
So we hit it off. We decided to exchange personal details and I called her up and we'd talk on Skype too. We'd laugh, joke, and just talk about everything under the sun - including her past relationships. She was engaged to be married but the guy got another woman pregnant and the marriage was cancelled. She talked about some of her boyfriends being abused and drinking all the time. She told me about her parents and how she moved out of the house at a young age and supports herself by having a masters degree in economics and works in Manilla and helps with city planning. We talked for months and months. We'd get intimate on Skype, she'd start fingering her pussy, moaning that she wished I was inside her.
"When are you coming, or should I come visit you?" she asked.
My heart raced. So I made plans to take off work for a week and fly out to the Philippines. It's a long flight and I couldn't even sleep - but when I got on the ground I got off the plane, and went outside the airport and called her. She was waiting for me and saw me standing by the road, and honked her horn. She got out of her car and ran up to me, gave me a great big hug and kissed me on the lips. Holy fuck she looked better than her pictures, she could have easily been a model. I loaded my luggage in her car and hopped in the passenger seat. I'm used to order, at least somewhat order - but driving in the Philippines scared the ever fuck out of me. It was very unnerving. From nice paved roads to roads cratered with massive potholes then to dirt roads - we finally made it to her small house that she was renting. We talked all the way to her place, I was so shocked I finally got to meet her - because I didn't feel like it would ever happen.
I was nervous and didn't want to push myself on her, I was worried that maybe I was ugly to her in person.
We got inside, and she made me feel right at home.
"You must be hungry! I cooked this yesterday for you, I'll heat it up, and I'll get you some tea!"
She spoke perfect English, with a small accent from Tagalog.
I told her not to worry. I felt a bit nervous - all the discussions we had, all the cybersex we had - I felt out of place.
She called me over to her small little kitchen table and had a plate prepared for me, with hot peppers, fish and some other ingredients. I have no idea what it's called (even to this day).
"You said you like spicy babe," she said smiling.
I took a few bites. My mouth was on fire, tears ran down my face.
"Holy fuck!" I said, "It's perfect."
She giggled, and her small firm chest bounced at bit. She caught me looking.
"Now now, there's enough time for that later. You still think I'm attractive right? I was so worried that you wouldn't think I'm attractive... "
I looked at her, "You're beautiful, absolutely stunning. Of course I'm attracted to you - physically and mentally. Hopefully I'm not ugly to you..."
Her eyes widened, "Oh, you're fucking hot dude, I'm still very interested in you!"
So we watched some TV, she obviously was horny, as I held her hand she guided me down her shorts to reveal a shaved and dripping wet pussy.
I haven't had sex in a long time. I didn't last long at all. Just how tight she was, how perfect her body was, and how beautifully she looked right into my eyes while I was inside her. I felt her touch my soul so deeply.
"I always imagined this moment, just like this..." she said, smiling.
"Oh, I thought I'd last a lot longer than I did, it's your turn to cum..."
She moaned as she played with my cum dripping out of her swollen pussy. Her fingers spread her dark brown pussy lips aside, showing a beautiful pink inside, as white dribbles of my sperm leaked onto her couch.
My mouth found her small supple tits, licking and sucking - I worked my way down to her dripping shaved pussy, and started massaging her clit with my tongue.
She moaned and grabbed a fist full of my hair, pulling me closer as her hips moved back and forth as I ate her out.
"I'll always be yours, I love you..." she moaned.
"I love you too," I said taking a quick breath.
She began to buck and moan, "Fuck..." she whispered, releasing my hair from her grip.
"I'm not going to want to leave you here," I admitted.
It got late, we ate dinner and went to bed. We fucked again before falling asleep.
We were to lovers who seemed obsessed. She took the week off of work so she could show me the sites around Manilla.
While she took me around to see the sites, something popped into my head - "just marry her already."
I went into a jewelry store by myself (she had errands to run) and got her a nice engagement ring.
The next time she took me out on the town, there was this big beautiful fountain (not sure of the name of it) and I got down on one knee.
"You bring so much life to me, my mind body and soul would ache without you being in my life, will you marry me?"
Her eyes widened, and she looked right into my eyes. There was an uncomfortable silence which seemed to last for an eternity.
"Of course I'll marry you!"
People around us clapped and congratulated us.
I didn't know how easy it was to get married in the Philippines. It's almost like Vegas but without Elvis overseeing your vows.
We fucked every single day, sometimes twice to three times in the same day. We discussed that she was going to quit her job and move with me to the USA. So I helped her pack a lot of her stuff in boxes and we mailed the boxes to my address. She talked to her landlord who owned the property and told them she was leaving at the end of the week, so she can move to the USA with her husband.
The landlord congratulated her and wished her well.
I've been married to her for 15 years and she is still the most amazing woman I've ever met in my life.
We've had 2 kids together and her body snapped right back into shape. She's as beautiful as ever. A timeless beauty. So yeah. Sometimes those crazy mail order bride sites actually work.

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